"Nasty, put some clothes on!" Anyone who knows how I feel about Anna Kournikova ("She's not that great a tennis player; she hasn't even won a tournament! On top of that, she's really plain. The only reason people are gaga over her is because she's a blond Russian; the number of more attractive female tennis players on the tour is kind of staggering. Etc, etc etc.") will understand the intense glee this story brings me. Put that one in yer portfolio, sweetie.