HA! Someone brought this link into play in a discussion about Missy's slammin' new jam on ILXOR today. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (Surely this will get my brother to forgive me...)

MISSY ELLIOTT - "Work It"

This is the point where my brother disowns me, I think. This is one of the greatest tracks ever recorded. I didn't think she could top the madness of "Get Ur Freak On"; shows how little I know. A sample kicks things off imploring the DJ to pick up the phone and take a request, and BOY DOES HE EVER. Simultaneously sexy and threatening, the kickdrum slinks all around the offbeats while a buzzing synth line floats over some wood blocks. Missy spits some of the most ridiculous lines of her career; yes, I do think that "Call before you come so I can shave my cho-cha" beats out "Beep beep/Who got the keys to my jeep?/VROOOOOOOOOOM!" The whole thing is geared towards the party and the dance floor, so much so that I defy ANYONE to listen to it and not nod your head or bounce your shoulders. LONDON CRU: If you are still doing karaoke nights, this must be added to the repertoire (Emma and Sarah could KILL the place with this song!).

Link love: How quickly we fall out of old habits. Now that ILXOR has begun to eat up all of my online time, I've neglected my referrals until now, which means I just discovered some folks who have linked me. So, big ups to a joshua tree in every pot..., The Rub, qwertyuiop, and Radio Free Narnia. Since it still seems that people are coming here and reading things, I will try to do a better job of writing stuff for this site.

FINALLY! I've done some much-needed maintainence on my blog template. All of the links should work and my singing schedule as I know it should be up to date.

It's been a while since I've posted anything. I've been too wrapped up in work and ILX (which is moving, by the way) to keep up with the old blog. I'll just say that b3ta is now one of my favorite sites on the Internet and I can't seem to stop playing "Tower Of Strength" by The Mission UK.

The oddest thing on the Internet: Send Sylvester Stallone's mother $100 and a photocopy of your butt and she'll tell you your future. Part of the reading must include, "You are a gullible sap who sends creepy con artists pictures of your butt." (Link taken from b3ta, home of many odd things on Internet.)

CORRECTION: DJ Martian told me about The Rapture. Tim's actual quote was "The Cure fronted by Ian McCulloch" and was describing Interpol, another band I am investigating.

I'm currently listening to some moody down-tempo project by Paul Oakenfold that's essentially soundtrack music. Taken on that level, it's actually pretty cool, but I don't see myself pulling this one out for a listen very often.

The Rapture: I'd heard a limited amount of the buzz surrounding these guys in the UK, but hadn't really paid attention to them until Sir Tim Finney described them as "Echo and the Bunnymen fronted by Robert Smith". This is such a dead-on description of their breakthrough single "House Of Jealous Lovers" that I'm kicking myself repeatedly for not finding out more about them earlier. Even better, though, is the fact that their follow-up single "Olio" sounds like F.U.S.E fronted by Robert Smith. I AM DEEPLY OBSESSED WITH THIS BAND NOW.

You can judge for yourself by listening to the Real Audio clips here. The singer really does sound like a younger version of Robert Smith, though, so if you hate his vocals you might want to take a few minutes to prepare yourself before diving into the aural wonderfulness.

Ali and His Gang vs. Mr. Tooth Decay: I have discovered the best MP3s on the Internet, better even than that site about the Bugaloos that I found last week that I forgot to blog about. Who knew that Ali the Champ was responsible for cracking the Liberty Bell? Who knew that Frank Sinatra wanted kids to lose their teeth by eating ice cream? As an added bonus, there's a fight between Muhammed Ali and Mr. Tooth Decay narrated by HOWARD COSELL. I mean, look at this thing (click for larger picture):

BEST ALBUM EVER!!!

Semen 'makes women happy': I am now convinced that the reason life exists on Earth is to generate ridiculous stories for my amusement.

Where's Waldo? Please believe me when I say that this is absolutely worth your time. This link is best viewed with a sound card.

How Jedi Are You?

:: how jedi are you? ::

You have no idea how happy I am right now.

Cat Boxing:What's cuter than domesticated cats slapping each other silly? NOT MUCH, I TELL YOU.

Disturbing link of the week: Here's an idea for you last-minute Father's Day shoppers!

Twee link of the week: Have you felt that your life was incomplete without a web-animated kitten singing a love song to a Cubist's idea of a puppy? Click this link and achieve nirvana.

Anyone out there who knows Ned Raggett will appreciate this one:

Emined LIVES!

Picture of the week:

oh NO!!!!!

Taking Sides: Police brutality or criminally negligent parenting?

STEAL THIS LINK: I actively encourage everyone who stumbles across this page to put this link on your own site. The more people we can attract to this thread via Google, the better.

WHY DAN PERRY IS A HORRIBLE FRIEND:

- I've forgotten at least three birthdays so far this month. (Happy brithday, Theo! Happy birthday, Jeff! Happy birthday, Liza!)
- I have neglected to write back friends who have attempted to keep in touch with me. (Hi Sara! Hi Amber!)
- I have mooched horribly off of co-workers in bars because I'm too broke to buy a round of drinks.
- I have seen the future, and it will be.
- I promised Poem-Cees CDs to people and never sent them. (Hi Simon! Hi Jeff! Hi John!)

This all ends today. Today I shall get off of my lazy behind and get back in touch with people. I will begin compiling stuff I've promised to people. I will start writing more, both fiction and non-fiction. I will FINALLY redesign this horrible-looking site and put up my current concert information. (ON THIS FRONT: Boston Pops, May 31 & June 1; 7:30 PM. Hear me sing John Williams along with 59 other people!)

I've said this before, but I really mean it this time.